A feeling of worry or fear, especially about the future
Hypthetical human – MR. ZEE
Acrophobic- Fear of heights
Zee was on ground level and I told him about looking up at the man standing on a high rise building. He immediately dipped his head low and ignored me. It totally unsettled his mind when I coaxed further. For Z bungee jumping and sky diving is a complete nightmare.
(Now my sadistic mind HAHA) —I have this weird thought—What if someone would put Zee on a plane and prepares him to jump but not let him actually take the jump -for hours. What would that experience be like for him?
That’s dwelling in the fear of height. Dwelling there in the fear is what aggravates the problem.
What we do with our future is the same what Zee experiences with heights. The difference is that Zee can jump off some day with a parachute and overcome his fear of height. How do you land yourself into the future to know exactly what will happen and fix it?
Yes, that’s exactly what we want. We want to know if anything will go wrong and we want to fix it before it happens. We want a guarantee for everything. “Subject to market risks and conditions” —Whoever thought saying that line fast is cool—(Major eye rolling).
“You are not great because you can plan. You are great because your plan can evolve with changing times.”
For the longest time, I had this phobia of plans failing. (not atychiphobia exactly). It was like, nothing I plan should fail and my goal should be achieved in the way I had planned things. Seems so fanciful. The aim was to get to the destination, but I loved planning so much that I attached myself to the plan I chose. Knowing it’s all about the enjoying journey; but the need to obsess over my plans made me control the journey. Control Freeaakkk!
Hehe! Not anymore.
Imagine someone falling from a chair! Wouldn’t you laugh out loudly? Plans failing should have the same reaction if we were not too attached to the plan. We are not our plans- plans failing doesn’t mean that we failed. We are still the ones who can plan better now that we know how not to fall from the chair. And we can still look back and laugh at it.
Plans need to restructure as per every probable future. Even if your plans are flexible and you can adapt to any change, there will always be an unknown factor to the future.
COPING WITH THE UNKNOWN:
Keep it simple 😉 —Eyes on the prize! And keep checking your form(plans), correcting your form (restructuring your plans) and getting better on the way. Because no one likes an undeserving win, even you’ll hate getting your prize without paying the price for it. Once you know you cannot control the journey or fixate on one single plan —you will easily accept any future that is thrown on you.
Now a lot of people just sit back and blame the situation (Arey corona aa gaya na, that’s why no gym) and give up on the goal. You failed to restructure your old plan. Locus of control remember the 4th week of Monday Real talk on insta. You’re responsible for your goals. Plans can fail as per outside situation, let that go and you still have to own up for the part you play in the journey.
I’m no GURU and this really is a medical condition, which needs to be treated clinically or through therapy. My personal experience says any disorder stems from a habit we develop over time. When you’ve actually allotted a room to this fear in your head. It starts living in you. It affects your livelihood and relationships.
Prevention is cure
Having counter balancing habits before dwelling in the fear becomes a habit—is the preventive way. We sort of know where it stems from. We only need to battle it out with love and empowerment.
—“I am healthy and fine and if something happens we’ll plan as per that.” Practical and assuring.
—“I’m investing in this now it seems good, we’ll keep checking if it seems a bad buy we’ll let it go and take it from there.” Healthy attitude.
—“I am doing my best, if I find a different way which works I’ll try that too.” No panic!
Just like how Z ignored my request to look up at a high rise building—throw some attitude to your fears. It’s like an unwanted guest. It’s okay to have them at your door visiting dropping-off reality-checks. Just don’t let them come live with you.
SEEK HELP FROM YOUR FAMILY, FRIENDS and PROFESSIONALS