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When Curiosity Strikes

I thought I heard this girl scream a name as she flung the ball at the bowling pins. On my recent bowling game, I was very intently watching a few teenage girls play on the neighbouring lane; reminding me of my teenage years. They were dancing after every shot and were cheering for the others noisily even if it meant a humble score of five. I had just hit two gutters in a frame and would try anything to get back in the game, so I followed suit. I scooped the ball up and said someone’s name, who I believed in, under my breath. Gutter again! So the second attempt I picked it up and said my name “C’mon Sneha!”. It knocked off eight pins. 

Its hard to be confident sometimes, forget about believing in yourself. Some people fear getting over-confident and under-play it. Some have an unhealthy image about themselves. Some fear not being accepted if they be themselves. A few over-think it and miss the bus.  Why do we develop these notions and things that make us want to second guess our own abilities? Retrospection is good, but can it lead to over thinking? When do you know is the right time to jump into the rabbit hole and are you ever going to be ready? Alice wasn’t ready, but she was curious. 

Curiosity is like this tiny spark which pushes us into trying new things out and gives us the courage to go beyond our doubts. Without curiosity firing the minds of Thomas Edison, The Wright Brothers and Einstein, do you think they would overcome any of their insecurities and doubts? No. Curiosity is the key to getting out of the web of low self-esteem. Curiosity leads us to making an attempt and even when we fail, the curiosity sits like a spike on your chair; not letting you sit till you have an answer. It leads to inventions, revelation of ideas, and might lead to huge shifts in market. On a personal level it changes you to believe in yourself. Once you learn from your mistakes by feeding your curiosity, you get the knowledge of how not to do things. This knowledge feeds the curiosity— “How else then?” 

Believing in yourself doesn’t come naturally if you’ve not explored all your qualms and made some mistakes. Getting a few bad cakes, the first few times you bake, will make you a good chef; Getting a whole lot of bad batches, before you hit it off, will make you excellent. For baking the bad ones, you only have to go out there and attempt it. Fall and learn. 

Have you read about the man who gave up trying to go to the moon or who gave up trying a new recipe? There are no ballads about people who stopped trying. Even if you don’t want a song about you, you do want to live a meaningful life. So how do we end up unhappy sometimes with our situations? — we stop being curious. We have a split and we just roll the bowling ball down the lane hoping it hits at least one pin. We don’t ask “how do I get both?” Somewhere in our minds we shut ourselves from experiencing the answers, confrontations or any discomfort and don’t let our curiosity be expressed. 

Other times you have enough knowledge to back up your faith and you go ahead with feigning it. Affirmations is the ability to program your mind into believing. This is because the mind doesn’t know the difference between what is real or fantasy. You can make-believe yourself into thinking you’ve got this. That’s how people who lift three times their body weight, do it. Envisioning things mentally prepares you to have it; then when you work for it, it doesn’t seem like work. Of course back it up with knowledge, I don’t suggest you envision wings and try foolish things. 

What’s even more foolish is to think we know it all; that’s a place you don’t want to be in. Curiosity doesn’t live there and you might be proudly getting average scores and dying of insecurity inside. Get down, keep engaging in the same thing over and over till you’ve learnt. Then our scores will do the talking. 

We are programmed to see life through a certain filter. Through the influence of social media, news and politics, we like to see life through those pretty lenses. Sometimes our curiosity can become very clouded with questions that bring us in loop to the same answers. May be we keep asking the same question. If you keep testing a blue litmus with an acidic solution it will keep turning red. We have to use other tests. De-clutter, speak to people, get some air, travel, workout the creative side of your mind and see if you’re asking better questions. 

Confidence is then just an over coat that people see, and you don’t even realize. You only have the knowledge of having been there, done that; and that becomes a part of you that no one can take away: self belief. Knowledge is the only handle we need to pull and curiosity is the key. Even after all this you will have moments you won’t believe in yourself, because there is always scope for more learning, there is no end. Learning is the only curve we need to care about in our lives. So jump right in, scream your name out loud and throw the ball, watch it roll. 

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High on life

How tough is it to feel high spirited all the time? Is social media to be blamed? I have not been able to stop myself from using a lot of Facebook, Instagram and Whatsapp. I could just say its unavoidable but I personally know a lot of people who hardly or never use it to go about their lives. Did it get me anxious at some point? Yes. Does the likes and comments on social media give me a high? It did, at least sub consciously.

No one would document their entire life on social media, especially not the lows. You just have to know everyone’s human and no one is posting a selfie when they are crying. Imagine seeing photos of people crying everyday, that’s not what you want. So be happy for someone if they’re doing good. I only got this recently thanks to Hitha Chandrashekhar‘s ‘hithavachana“. Have courage to find people posting their beautiful moments on the web and not feel bad about yourself, or your life. Self talk- ‘Dont make it about you.’ Its their moment of shining glory, clap for your tribe. WE CANNOT COMPARE.

Everything’s downhill one second and exorbitantly great the next. I don’t know this unpredictability is growing on me or I’m ignoring the lows. Now I can say I’ve come a long way from that. “Not all days are the same!” This was told to me by my Coach at boxing class when I was upset about not giving my best. We cannot expect all days to be the best. Everyday is not a Sunday and we have to love Mondays too with equal force. EACH DAY IS BEST IN ITS OWN WAY, TAKE WHAT YOU CAN FROM IT.

The one thing that keeps me really up and about is my workout schedule and my body clock. I don’t compromise on it and my body doesn’t compromise on me. Its important to have a morning routine and I go up to my terrace to see the sunrise even if its cloudy. Even if it’s a bad day look for the good- that’s the message I’m taking in everyday. And when its that golden goldy coming out of the tank of my neighbours building I close my eyes and just feel the light on my face. That’s me. You could have your own thing going. MORNING ROUTINE.

Exercising or sportsobviously as the internet and mostly everyone I know of, proclaims to keep your mood up! There’s not much I can add to it, its all out there, endorphins, sweating it out, blood circulation, be active. WORKOUT.

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Watching movies like “Chak de” or “Bhaag Milkha Bhaag”, “Wonder Woman” and “Creed” brings the enthu cutlet out of me. I keep myself in reach of anything that can motivate me. Its just contagious. Reading books help too. The lead character from the series “Me Before You”, “Me After You”, and “Still Me” by Jojo Moyes, Louisa Clark really inspires me to be upbeat in every situation. My friend once suggested I watch videos of people breaking their limits before I workout and Yes that does get your spirits up. GET INSPIRED.

This one you don’t want to try for every time. I use all the healthy food that I like as a motivator, like dark chocolate and banana chips. I set it like a reward system. If I finish my work by a time I’ve set, I get a piece of the healthy treat. Its like a carrot stick effect. It totally works for me and I’m not indulging in something completely off my lifestyle. TRICK AND TREAT.

Sometimes I break my routine by doing something very different. I call a friend in the middle of work, eat in front of the TV, don’t speak for a whole day. Its what distracts me from my routine, but believe me these small changes have a huge effect when you get back to the regular. Travel can’t be convenient for everyone at all times, so try to do some thing differently everyday. May be play music in the shower if you don’t already. MAKE IT DIFFERENT.

Last one, to be motivated you have to care enough about something, that you are interested in. Enough to do something about it. If you don’t care about anything and you don’t mind being complacentabout everything, then you really don’t land yourself anywhere but where you already are. CARE ABOUT SOMETHING.

Start making an effort towards your attitude to approaching anything in life. If you want to be motivated all the time its up to you. When you find your own motivator inside you, you don’t need to look outside. Or wait for someone to cheer you, you are enough. It’s a skill you want to develop because not everyone is waiting to pat your back. Keep the spirits up and amplify the motivating voice inside.

 

Motivation in the 21stcentury business world

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Travelling as an Indian tourist 

I want my country to be the best and this is coming from the small kid in me who sang the Indian national anthem in her school, everyday at morning assembly. This patriotic feeling will never go away and I’m not a soldier but just an honest citizen.

I have been to many countries with my family, and coming directly to the point, not many countries are happy to have us, Indians, around. My first thought when I felt this resistance was ‘oh! racism!’. It was easy to just give it a word.

Then more travelling and I also came to this understanding that there are Indian restaurants in every corner of the world, there are more Indian tourists in so many parts of the world than tourists of any other nationality, there are so many countries depending on the Indian tourists for their tourism industry. They should be waiting to have us then, don’t you think?

Then came some more travelling and believe me I can’t stand some of the Indian tourists, not for more than 10 min. I hope you’re not one of them. I know there is still more travelling to do and more to understand but at this point I have to write, I have been challenged to protect my country from getting a bad reputation, how am I supposed to face that when I’m on a holiday.


So I write this to every Indian who is holding a passport and plans to leave India, do not push in any queue or cut lines in a queue, you have got to wait for your turn and I’m sure we’ve learnt that in our country, if not now is the time.

There isn’t anything as one’s “Personal Standard Time”, we have to stick to the time we say we want to reach a place and by doing that we save a lot of trouble for the people helping us see their country.

We cannot look down upon people based on their professions or their occupation standards, they are living their lives in their capacity and we have to respect them as humans and behave as you would expect them to behave with us.

We know we love our celebrations and the festive feel when we have a big group with us, but is it fair to encroach upon the space of other people by bringing the noise along with us where ever we go? We need to understand that space means so much more than just physical body, it’s the whole environment around us and we need to respect others’ spaces. Keep it quiet if there are others commuting or in public areas have fun in your own space.
Yes we have a very different culture back in our country and we can learn how to adjust incase we travel, not throw garbage around their city, or cross the roads everywhere.


Yes, I was lucky to have parents who have helped me learn, but I can now understand that it’s a culture clash and many have not had the opportunity to travel and for first timers it can be a challenge to face different cultures. But please let’s do our best and build some good reputation for our future, so our kids don’t face resistance just because they are Indians.

A word to other countries, please stop generalising, one bad experience does not mean every Indian you meet is going to give you a tough time and it is mutual tolerance at the end of the day, we all have something to learn. Let’s have patience and help each other.

For India, because the more I travel the more I love my country and people, we are so much more as a country and we can change for the better and we will.
Jai hind!

TED talk: A Brilliant watch-

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YMyofREc5Jk